Czar and Away.
This might just be the new name for Memo's from the Czar. As my good friend Oakton Andy has suggested in his previous post. I will try it out and see. It is sort of a quick hits section as well.
First of all, I have 1979 by Smashing Pumpkins stuck in my head. As I have reflected upon this band over the weekend, I have remembered just what a great group they really were. I have also reflected upon how their namesake reminds of one of my favorite activities I was involved in one year around Halloween. Enough said.
Cont'd from last post: Your Comments on my last entry have inspired me. I give you another reality TV show based on Kelly's comment. (I do not know how long this next part will be up so read it while you can. It may be removed if to offensive, I certainly don't mean for it to be.)
This show would be based on Midgets. I am not sure if it would be a reality show or a mock reality show. Anyways, we would build a house or even a small town for midgets to live in. The catch is, we would build to their size NOT a normal persons size. Then we would find a person with normal height and get them to live in the midget world for a week or two. I know this show would be a hit and while it sounds mean on the surface, it really does sound like something the networks would do. Have you seen the Surreal World? Of course, the name of the show would have to be Smallville.
PS: For a theme song you could take the theme from Gidget and substitute the word midget.
Dog the Bounty Hunter: I stumbled upon this reality show the other day. It is about this Bail Bondsman in Hawaii that hunts down people who skip bail and arrests them. This guy is over the top. I want to see a show about a real bounty hunter though. Like Bobba Fett, who has armor and a flame thrower and fly's around blasting people.
From the Prussian "Free" Artisan League: This a brief review of the movie Bewitched, which I saw for free the other night. Simply put, I am glad it was free. I had reasonable hope going into this movie. After all, it had Will Ferrall, Nicole Kidman, Michael Caine, Jason Schwartzman and Steve Caral in it. Nicole Kidman looked about as cute as you could imagine but Will Ferrall looked as lost as you could imagine. His humor seemed old hat and he seemed to struggle with what to do really do to be funny. It had it's moments of course but save it for a rental from Payless at best. Also, as interesting anecedote, my parents never allowed me to watch the TV show as a kid, but I somehow still ended up playing Dungeons & Dragons. They should have just let me watch it anyway.
H.P. Lovecraft: Also I have started reading H.P. Lovecraft. An early 20th century Sci-fi/Horrer writer, most noted for the cult classic, The Call of Cthulu, as well as creating the Necronomican. (See Army of Darkness and other weird tales.) I hope to post some quotes by him because he is a brilliant writer and has a very interesting way of looking at things. Ways I can relate to. He also loved cats.
New York: Most of you know by now that I am considering moving to New York City. So I am taking a public opinion poll. What do you think? Should I stay or should I go? I am open to other suggestions of where to go as well so long as you don't tell me to to the place of fire and brimstone.
Tomorrow I'm sending of my first manuscript to a contest for publication. I'm really excited about it and it gives me a really good feeling to do so. It is the sort of feeling that says your doing something you were meant to do. Will I win or lose? I have no clue, but I am none the less excited. Pray for that if you think about it. Ironically enough I am sending it to the L. Ron Hubbard Writers of the Future Contest. Maybe Tom Cruise will read it and star in a movie about it. Better yet he will read it, introduce me to Katie Holmes and she will introduce me James Van Der Beek and I can get his autograph. I would then hang it in my room.
Well, I suppose that is it for now. I really enjoy everyone's responses and whatnot. The posts are almost a blog in and of themselves. I love you all like you were my very own illegitimate children. Good night.
Monday, June 27, 2005
Thursday, June 16, 2005
Memo's from the Czar vol 1
This is a new section I created. I have named it this for now but it is subject to change. Any ideas for a better name? It really consists of random thoughts and ideas that come to me every now and then. Some are funny, some are in response to your comments on my posts (Yes you inspire me), some are just quick hits on the world around me. So without further delay I give you Memo's from the Czar vol 1.
First, I have Don't Stop Believing, by Journey stuck in my head.
Little House: Faith mentioned "Little House on the Prairie" in response to my last blog. I used to love that show as a kid. However, we always called it "Little Tragedy on the Prairie" because every episode had something new and horrible happen. If it wasn't a tornado it was a plague, followed by fire and then a flood. Then the locust swarm would make an appearance and destroy the crops and if not them then a swarm of fire fly's would, but not before bandits came and threatened the town. Mary went blind at least three different times I think. Later on aliens abducted cattle and a rift into another dimension opened and the tortured souls of the warp spewed forth, but it turns out they came forth to help fight the zombie hordes, so they were good. At one point the Olsen's make an all powerful ring to rule the town but with the help of the wood Elves Laura destroyed it before it was to late. There was even an episode where Albert forms a Goth band and "done went crazy." Fortunately the Ninja's from the Burning Tiger Fist who were hiding in the Chinese railroad labor camps came and saved him from the evils of Rock 'N Roll. I really don't see how anyone survived back then. I was also always annoyed at the intro scene when they run down the hill and the one little girl always falls down. Learn to walk already! I also had a secret crush on one of the characters but I won' say which. It was a female however, so no Willy Olson.
Danica Patrick: The world of racing now has a female driver, Danica Patrick. What I want to know is if her insurance is lower then the male drivers insurance. Also, (warning: this is a female driver joke) I think racecar driving is a great career for women because they can only turn one way so they can't get lost.
Reality TV: Ok reality TV is obviously not reality. When was the last time you were stranded on a desert island left with only a film crew? And I sure as heck can't remember anytime I had a panel of babes trying to get me to pick them to go out on a date. They have shows out I didn't even know existed. Such as Dancing with the Stars and The Cut. That being said I have a few shows of my own. Here they are:
Beer Factor: Follows a fraternity around and sees how many beers it takes for them to perform certain acts. Like jumping off roofs and trying to hip hop dance.
Real Desperate Housewives:This show examines the crazy antics of middle aged housewives with nothing to do but watch Oprah. Watch them watch day time TV and follow them as they go yard art hunting. Be thrilled as you see them on the weekends go to craft shows and buy little angels and objects shaped like Texas to hang on their walls.
The OC-D: This could be the real fear factor, as eight contestants with one of my favorite disorders, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, are forced to live in a run down, dirty, dingy house with no automatic dishwashers and insects in the walls. See them as they try and open bathroom doors without the use of hands or watch them squirm as they have to wash dishes the old fashioned way. The last one to make it without going crazy wins.
"Just Friends": This show follows the love lives of five college students who are pursuing girls way out of their leagues. Laugh as their tender and frail hearts are ripped out and stopped on in a "your a nice guy but..." kind of way. Partially autobiographical. (This show could also be about any guy in college life interested in a girl.)
American Idle: This modern documentary follows the lives of middle aged, overweight couch potatoes. Watch these fine American men as they watch TV, eat chips, play video games, ignore their families (the two who are married) and otherwise waste the lives they are given while they sit around and wait for the heart attack they are inducing to occur.
The Apprentice: This show follows the dramatic story of a young Dark Jedi trying desperately to live up to his indomitable Sith Masters demands. See him snivel as he is berated.
"D" is for Didn't Win: This show follows the life of John Kerry after the 2004 presidential elections. As well the recent discovery of his below average grades in college.
That's all for now. I know this is the tip of the iceberg and I expect Korey to go to town with this.
Later gang.
First, I have Don't Stop Believing, by Journey stuck in my head.
Little House: Faith mentioned "Little House on the Prairie" in response to my last blog. I used to love that show as a kid. However, we always called it "Little Tragedy on the Prairie" because every episode had something new and horrible happen. If it wasn't a tornado it was a plague, followed by fire and then a flood. Then the locust swarm would make an appearance and destroy the crops and if not them then a swarm of fire fly's would, but not before bandits came and threatened the town. Mary went blind at least three different times I think. Later on aliens abducted cattle and a rift into another dimension opened and the tortured souls of the warp spewed forth, but it turns out they came forth to help fight the zombie hordes, so they were good. At one point the Olsen's make an all powerful ring to rule the town but with the help of the wood Elves Laura destroyed it before it was to late. There was even an episode where Albert forms a Goth band and "done went crazy." Fortunately the Ninja's from the Burning Tiger Fist who were hiding in the Chinese railroad labor camps came and saved him from the evils of Rock 'N Roll. I really don't see how anyone survived back then. I was also always annoyed at the intro scene when they run down the hill and the one little girl always falls down. Learn to walk already! I also had a secret crush on one of the characters but I won' say which. It was a female however, so no Willy Olson.
Danica Patrick: The world of racing now has a female driver, Danica Patrick. What I want to know is if her insurance is lower then the male drivers insurance. Also, (warning: this is a female driver joke) I think racecar driving is a great career for women because they can only turn one way so they can't get lost.
Reality TV: Ok reality TV is obviously not reality. When was the last time you were stranded on a desert island left with only a film crew? And I sure as heck can't remember anytime I had a panel of babes trying to get me to pick them to go out on a date. They have shows out I didn't even know existed. Such as Dancing with the Stars and The Cut. That being said I have a few shows of my own. Here they are:
Beer Factor: Follows a fraternity around and sees how many beers it takes for them to perform certain acts. Like jumping off roofs and trying to hip hop dance.
Real Desperate Housewives:This show examines the crazy antics of middle aged housewives with nothing to do but watch Oprah. Watch them watch day time TV and follow them as they go yard art hunting. Be thrilled as you see them on the weekends go to craft shows and buy little angels and objects shaped like Texas to hang on their walls.
The OC-D: This could be the real fear factor, as eight contestants with one of my favorite disorders, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, are forced to live in a run down, dirty, dingy house with no automatic dishwashers and insects in the walls. See them as they try and open bathroom doors without the use of hands or watch them squirm as they have to wash dishes the old fashioned way. The last one to make it without going crazy wins.
"Just Friends": This show follows the love lives of five college students who are pursuing girls way out of their leagues. Laugh as their tender and frail hearts are ripped out and stopped on in a "your a nice guy but..." kind of way. Partially autobiographical. (This show could also be about any guy in college life interested in a girl.)
American Idle: This modern documentary follows the lives of middle aged, overweight couch potatoes. Watch these fine American men as they watch TV, eat chips, play video games, ignore their families (the two who are married) and otherwise waste the lives they are given while they sit around and wait for the heart attack they are inducing to occur.
The Apprentice: This show follows the dramatic story of a young Dark Jedi trying desperately to live up to his indomitable Sith Masters demands. See him snivel as he is berated.
"D" is for Didn't Win: This show follows the life of John Kerry after the 2004 presidential elections. As well the recent discovery of his below average grades in college.
That's all for now. I know this is the tip of the iceberg and I expect Korey to go to town with this.
Later gang.
Monday, June 13, 2005
Crazy about Katie
Well, the weekend has passed and I am a day late on a new blog. Please forgive me if you can ever find it in your heart to do so. That being said, here is what's on my mind.
Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes. How can they not be on my mind? They are everywhere after all, and while I certainly don't mind seeing images of Katie Holmes, I think I'm already getting tired of the hoopla. In all honesty, how much of this goo-goo gaga twiterpation are we going to have to endure? You do know how they got together right? Tom Cruise just had his agent call her agent and set up an appointment and now they are in love. Man, that's a good hook up, and I thought Equally Yoked or Eharmony was the way to go.
I simply don't understand the fascination and the truth be known, down right worship, that society has for celebrities. It's a very real American Idol. People get so caught up in what actor is dating what actress and how romantic it is. I figure they must do it to avoid the reality of their own failing lives and meaningless existence's, an escape so to speak. It's ok if your mom's a drunk and your dad beats her and they are splitting up and you will have hurts that will probably never heal. It's all good as long as Tom Cruise is with Katie Holmes, or Brad Pitt is happy again now that Jennifer Anniston is gone.
For me personally, one of the most trying times in my life was when Ben Afleck and J-Lo were together. I had to have Valium prescribed just to keep me going. I was so worried about their constant break ups, and I blame them for my three D's in Algebra. How could I concentrate? Thank goodness Ben is now with that nice Garner girl. All is right in the world and I can rest easy, at least for now, which is what I'm going to do. Good night.
PS> Next blog I will probably take on either A.) Scientology or B.) Michael Jackson
Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes. How can they not be on my mind? They are everywhere after all, and while I certainly don't mind seeing images of Katie Holmes, I think I'm already getting tired of the hoopla. In all honesty, how much of this goo-goo gaga twiterpation are we going to have to endure? You do know how they got together right? Tom Cruise just had his agent call her agent and set up an appointment and now they are in love. Man, that's a good hook up, and I thought Equally Yoked or Eharmony was the way to go.
I simply don't understand the fascination and the truth be known, down right worship, that society has for celebrities. It's a very real American Idol. People get so caught up in what actor is dating what actress and how romantic it is. I figure they must do it to avoid the reality of their own failing lives and meaningless existence's, an escape so to speak. It's ok if your mom's a drunk and your dad beats her and they are splitting up and you will have hurts that will probably never heal. It's all good as long as Tom Cruise is with Katie Holmes, or Brad Pitt is happy again now that Jennifer Anniston is gone.
For me personally, one of the most trying times in my life was when Ben Afleck and J-Lo were together. I had to have Valium prescribed just to keep me going. I was so worried about their constant break ups, and I blame them for my three D's in Algebra. How could I concentrate? Thank goodness Ben is now with that nice Garner girl. All is right in the world and I can rest easy, at least for now, which is what I'm going to do. Good night.
PS> Next blog I will probably take on either A.) Scientology or B.) Michael Jackson
Wednesday, June 08, 2005
From the Front
Ladies and Gentlemen, I have discovered this new cutting edge bit of pop culture called a block, so I thought I would be one of the first to have one. I can only hope they take off. Seriously though, this may very well qualify as the trendiest thing I have ever done since buying those pair of Z Cavaricci's back in junior high.
It must be said that, in all honesty, it is currently unknown to me what form this blog will take. Will I wax eloquently or merely spew forth useless words? Will it be intellectual or just a bunch of poppycock. ( I do love to rant) I do not know, but I breathlessly wait to find out. However, I can guarantee you that it will most likely be very dark at times.
I call it Letters from the Front because in a sense, life is a war with theatres of action that extend from the mental, spiritual and emotional realms all the way into the heart of the physical realm as well. It is this war of sorts that inspires me to write in my feeble attempts to organize and sort life out, as well as just make fun of it.
So it is with much excitement that I give you this blog. I suspect that sooner rather then later I will find the confines of this blog to limiting and draw up some ideas for my own website but until then this will suffice. Well it is late and now time for me to go to bed so I wish you all a good night and I will write more later.
R. Jefferson Jordan
It must be said that, in all honesty, it is currently unknown to me what form this blog will take. Will I wax eloquently or merely spew forth useless words? Will it be intellectual or just a bunch of poppycock. ( I do love to rant) I do not know, but I breathlessly wait to find out. However, I can guarantee you that it will most likely be very dark at times.
I call it Letters from the Front because in a sense, life is a war with theatres of action that extend from the mental, spiritual and emotional realms all the way into the heart of the physical realm as well. It is this war of sorts that inspires me to write in my feeble attempts to organize and sort life out, as well as just make fun of it.
So it is with much excitement that I give you this blog. I suspect that sooner rather then later I will find the confines of this blog to limiting and draw up some ideas for my own website but until then this will suffice. Well it is late and now time for me to go to bed so I wish you all a good night and I will write more later.
R. Jefferson Jordan
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