The Jefferson Code

The time is 9:07 PST and I am listening to The Shins, who have quickly become one of my favorite bands. Today’s blog has been inspired by an event I was involved in yesterday. You see I went to my local 24 Hour Fitness, which surprisingly enough is not open 24 hours, (Almost as surprising as me working out.) and I walked up to the check in counter and there is a really cute girl behind it reading a book. I flash my ID and best smile at her, and I look down and happen to notice the book she is reading is titled, The Bible Code 2. Now I have heard of the Bible Code stuff before. About how there are secrets numerical codes hidden in the text of the Bible that make all sorts of prophecies including the prediction of 9/11 and of the current economic crisis, among other things. I found the fact they found a part 2 hilarious. Like maybe after they discovered this great code they realized they had left some out? Or maybe they found a whole new series of text and revelations to apply it to? I thought about making fun of it but like I said, the girl was really cute so I didn’t. I was however, tempted to ask her if it predicted that her and I would be together but I chickened out at the last minute. Yet it did inspire me to write this blog. I did a little research and it turns out there are many books with codes in them pertaining to a whole slew of topics. Here are some of them.

The Audacity of Hope Code - In Barak Obama’s book he secretly spells out exactly how he will win the presidency without actually telling us anything specific at all.

The Cosmopolitan Code- This magazines predicts which celebrities this year will get knocked up, married, divorced as well as how many kids Angelina Jolie will adopt and how many Eskimo Pie bars Kirstie Ally will eat.

The KFC Code- Slightly different in that it is not an actually book but rather a printed menu from KFC that actually reveals the Colonels secret recipe! Get out!

The Five People You Meet In Heaven Code- In an ironic twist this code actually reveals the eleven people you meet in hell. (Spoiler Alert: Princess Di’ is one of them.)

The Michelangelo Code: Almost as controversial as The DaVenci code, it tells of the secret lost linage of Merle Haggard.

The Lord of the Rings Code- A mysterious code that tells the true secret of the one ring, promising marriage to any nerd who deciphers the code.

The Horse Whisperer Code – Whispering was only the beginning. This code picks up where the whispers end and tells of the perverted, blasphemous acts it led too.

Mein Kompf – The code from Hitler’s infamous book actually reveals the winning numbers for the Iowa Mega Millions lotto for the week of June 11th, 2012.


Well anyways, this is your blog for the week so I hope you enjoy. Search my blog. If you find a code in it please let me know. I need all the help I can get. Later.