Monday, March 23, 2009

We Be Bloggin'

The time is 8:30 P.M. and I have still been listening to Neko Case. Ladies and gentleman we have much to discuss tonight. First of all I have not been faithful to my once a week bloggings. It has been more like once a week and two days. I apologize. I thought I could set aside Sunday’s for blogging, maybe rename it Blogsday, if you will, however Sundays have become rather busy as of late so we will see. Nonetheless, I am blogging now, to make up for lost time.

First of all, my dear citizens, if you look to your right you might notice a new gadget on my blog. This is the follower application and let’s you keep track of my blog as well as letting me know roughly how many people are reading this thing. I am asking you, as your vaunted czar, to sign up as a follower. In fact, if you don’t do it because I ask you to, then do so because as your czar, I command you to. It is your duty as citizens of New Prussia so show your allegiance!

Ritual Clubbings:
Okay, I have a confession to make, I went to a club Saturday night. I will be honest in saying I have never been to a club before, because I figured it really wasn’t my scene. (Which it’s not) but I do have some thoughts on it.

First of all, the club was called Ritual, which is the perfect name for a place that somebody with O.C.D. is visiting.

Also, it was an Asian club, which adds to the mystique. Being named Ritual and being Asian I wasn’t sure what I would find. I half expected at some point, maybe around midnight, for an alter to rise out of the floor as everyone works themselves into some ritualistic Cthulu like frenzy. Then they pick a hot girl from the audience and sacrifice her. (Probably not a virgin though.) Maybe something like the blood bath in the opening scene of the first blade movie. That did not happen much to my chagrin. There were however, some rituals going on, but most of those seemed to involve mating of some sorts.

Secondly, I am not sure I have ever felt this white in my life, at least not since that time I watched the Country Music Awards. I mean I was the ONLY white guy there. I was told this actually works in my favor because I stood out more. Not only that but there is apparently a subset of Asian girls out there who only date white guys. I need to find this subset. However, it seems to me that Asian girls who only date white guys would go to white clubs and not Asian clubs right?

Anyway, my biggest problem with clubs is that it requires dancing. Now I can swing dance and I can two-step. I could even pull off some bastard version of the Lindy Hop, but I will be dead and in my grave if I can club dance. I know alcohol helps, but it didn’t seem to do the trick. I feel so freaking awkward trying to dance at a club. I looked around a bit and most of the guys there couldn’t, so I shouldn’t have felt so out of place, yet none-the-less I did. Near the end I got out there for a spell, but I never found any sort of groove what so ever.

Not only that but it was also expensive, seeing as how it was 20 bucks just to park, but it was worth the experience.

I will say I had a very incriminating photo taken of me that I am debating whether or not I should post it on this blog. Maybe if enough people become followers of my blog I will.

For now I think the kind of clubbing I will stick to involves baby seals.

Okay gang, that is your weekly update. I have to go play Rainbow 6 Las Vegas so I will see you later.