Friday, July 06, 2007

Back From the Wild

Greetings fair citizens, the time is 8:45 and I am listening to Wilco- Being There, one of their earliest CD’s but it rocks.

Now I know it has been some time since I have blogged sweetly and I have to confess that I had been quite uninspired and maybe even down right bored as of late. However I am trying to force myself to get back into the swing of things.

So my dad and I went to Yellowstone National Park a little over a month ago. It was glorious and consisted of some good father/son time with no arguments, believe it or not. We saw lots of animals and due to how early in the year it was many of them had just given birth or were doing so while we were there. The mountains were gorgeous and on our first day there it actually snowed. The rest of the week the weather was in the 50’s and 60’s. The place is astounding but despite it immense beauty and majesty, in my opinion, the true power of Yellowstone lies in its quiet ability to heal the soul. However, I know you aren’t here to read about how great it was.

I do have a special treat for you today, my journal that I kept while on the trip. So it is with great honor that I present to you what I call….

The Yellow (Stone) Pages:

Mon, 28 May, 2007- Dear Diary, I cannot tell you what a great day it has been. We flew into Salt Lake City, the whitest airport in the world. On the plane I had to go to the bathroom. Let me tell you, using the cramped, smelly, restroom on the plane resulted in a truly great moment in OCD history. I think I can still smell the urine on my hands.

From Salt Lake we got a small turbo prop plane. I sat at the window by the propellers. As we flew, I watched them spinning and I must admit, I felt a little like Indiana Jones on his way to some great adventure, only without the whip, hat, gun, hot girl, or great adventure. Landed in Cody. Went to sleep.

Tues, 29 May, 2007 – Dear Diary, Pa and I woke up early, hopped in the car and began the hour or so drive to the park along the Chief Joseph Highway. Along the way we stopped at a pass that the great Native American leader Chief Joseph of the Nez Perce tribe led his people through as they tired to flee the reservation and escape to Canada. The government caught many of them and forced them back to the reservation. Many also died along the way, however some did escape. I am sure the fact the highway is named after him however makes up for everything. Silly Native Americans, trying to flee the reservation indeed! Arrived in Cooke City and got our rooms for the week.


Wed, 30 May 2007. – Pa and I went hiking. Along the way we ran into our first grizzly bear. We startled it and it was not happy with us. It looked so cute and cuddly until it decided it wanted to eat us. Pa and I ran but the grizzly was faster. While we were running Pa tripped me and I fell down as he ran on. Fortunately, I remembered you were supposed to play dead in this situation. The bear sniffed and pawed at me as I lay on the ground, but it got bored and soon left. Pa’s quick thinking saved us all. I named the bear Mr. Chocolate. I wuv you Mr. Chocolate.

Thurs, 31 May 2007 – Dear Diary, I have to be careful writing in you now. Last night Pa caught me and said that only queers and girls keep diaries, and that if he ever caught me again he would beat me and throw me back to Mr. Chocolate. Today we saw a wolf being chased by 3 coyotes, a marmot, a bald eagle and more buffalo then you could drive to extinction. We also saw a red fox.. I decided I want one for a pet. I have heard of people doing this before and I think they are cool. They are the perfect cross between a cat and a dog and let’s face it, they would go great with my hair.

Fri, 1 June 2007 - Dear Diary- I miss my Mom and cried last night after we went to bed. We will be home soon though. This was the last full day in the park. We saw the geysers and mud pools. It was scary but neat. We found a spot where they have these steaming hot pools of water. The sulfur smelled like rotten eggs and reminded me of the time I ate chilidogs at the Dairyette. We decided to try and cook hot dogs over the boiling water. I made a joke about having an old geezer by an old geyser. Pa laughed and then pushed me in. The searing hot water really burned and left marks on my body but afterwards I had to admit, it was pretty funny.

Sat, 2 June 2007 – Dearest of Diaries today was the last day of the trip. We drove through the park one last time. Pa asked me if I wanted him to just leave me here while he went back to Dallas. I was flattered that he wanted my vacation to continue even when his ended but I decided that I didn’t want to stay after all. He looked disappointed. That night we drove back to Cody and ate Pizza Hut. Good-bye Mr. Chocolate.

Sun, 3 June 2007 – Dear Diary - We flew back to Dallas today. Mom was waiting for us at the airport. It was good to see her again and I told her all about the great time Pa and I had together. I can’t wait until some day I have my own son to take such great trips with.

Well as you can see, at my father’s expense, we had a fun time together and it was nice to go nearly a whole week without seeing a Starbucks. I really did make the joke about having an old geezer by an old geyser. I’ll try and post a couple of pictures soon. Catch ya later.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Yay, Jeff is blogging again! Once per month is not frequent enough. I expect to get some good blogs during or immediately following Comic-Con. -- Scott

Andrew McMahan said...

Holy crap, this is hilarious. I want more vacation adventures of Pa and Jeff and Mr. Chocolate.

Anonymous said...

wonder what that poor wolf did to cause all those animals to chase it....
gw